As my own image-maker as well as a lonely gymnosophist. I still have my fresh ego besides narcissism. I have been trying to find my ego of the most real existence, but it seems that there are endless difficulties because my instant feelings usually change instantly. My active mind perhaps owed to the release of my instinct in nature when I was a child, which gave me courage to take risks and attempts. My perception in beliefs and arts comes from my family members. Sometimes, I have quite a lot of inspirations and thoughts in mind, which occur to me accidently out of my expectations. It makes me to express a fanciful mood of mine in an instant, and then my present state on the basis of the past, and so on. This makes me both suffering and joyful, and I am even being grateful for my numerous thoughts I do not like to repeat myself, neither to be stuck in the past.
The age of thirty is a quite interesting age, after experiencing the life and feelings of this age, I started to seek the definite answer about painting, evidences brought by time to me, myself as well as emotions related to me. Just like my personal exhibition this time, these works are my memories in the past four years, and they can bring my distinctive understanding of "material sense" and "drama sense" on oil paintings to everyone. In recent years, my works have essentially changed, and I have been started to explore myself and surrealism in my paintings, especially some kind of mystery and melancholy. Mystery is valuable because it can be otherworldly, and the partly visible melancholy feelings mark a start of good works. If there are no sorrows in life, good inspirations can be found nowhere, which is perhaps the reflection of my mind. Both expression forms and contemporaneity are very important, and things exist simultaneously with their occurrence. For example, I would dug up old photos to process it into one picture in my inner world by painting, or I would fantasy whom I could be. When I play the one I could be, I find that this picture has, contemporaneity as well as the uniqueness which can't be reproduced. As an artist of figurative painting, I would like to retrieve a bit of the painting essence loss.
For the exact boundary of my creation, I don't have a definite answer for now, and it needs to be interpreted by all of you. My thinking is affected by a lot of factors which, I believe, also imply a certain period of my life. I do not want to make my life as hurry as many people, but only to retain my life and then try my best to record it. But I still fail to find myself at this time, which is exactly the reason why I have been continuously seeking and making a breakthrough in creation.
I live in my own world, and write my own autobiography. I have dedicated my whole life to painting, and wish I would be the person who conveys happiness and persists in painting when you are thinking of me.
- Chen Chengwei